Saturday, January 12, 2013

Annie Are You OK, So, Annie Are You OK

I decided to write a serious post on obsession (the good kind….). People are always asking me for tips on obsession…ok, not always asking for tips. Occasionally, someone will ask me to find something for them though and I am all over that shizz. Cos I owns the internet’s and all its glorious stalking research capabilities. I mean I am basically an unpaid private investigator. Well, I mean, I get paid. The payment is solving the puzzle and the enjoyment, and the entertainment. OMG – MULDER totally wrote a profile about me in an X files episode (see…obsession)

Let me just start out by saying I am a fairly normal person. Normal has always been defined in my family as able to keep a job. But I have always been a curious person and liking things A LOT has always been a part of who I am.

For instance, when I was five I was totally in love with Adrian Zmed (TJ Hooker) and I used to kiss the TV. I really LIKED Adrian Zmed. My dad said I winked at the doctor when I was born so no one in my house thought it was weird that I was kissing the TV (electric shock and all) whenever Adrian Zmed came on screen.

Adrian Zmed was followed by a D.B.Cooper fascination when I was 10. I was totally obsessed with that story, short of calling the FBI to analyze the cigarette butt. I analyzed everything I could get my 10 year old baby hands on. I also had his FBI wanted picture hanging on my bedroom wall. Now most 10 year olds don’t have a pin board full of evidence but ya know different strokes for different folks. Still watch every show on D.B.

D.B. was followed up by JFK. Now when I was little I thought JFK lived under my bed. I also thought I was reincarnated and that I was on the grassy knoll the day he was assassinated. When I was 12 my dad drove me to the library so I could check out the Warren Report. I made sticky notes with all the disagreements I had with it and would bring it out when people came over to visit my parents.  

This was followed by Leo Dicaprio (still reigning..HELLLOOOO OSCAR long over due), Edward Furlong, the New Kids on the Block, Fox Mulder, Belle & Sebastian, countless movies and numerous books…you get my point.

Anyway, a lot of folks use obsession for good like running marathons and becoming doctors…and then there are swimfans, superfans and then my crowd (someone who exhibits a lot of attention to something for a short period of time...or until a new obsession comes on).

Now onto the tips:

If you are a beginner or just starting out you are going to just do your basic Google search. Now Google will give you a plethora of information. From Images (sayyyy whhhaaa) to Wikipedia to IMB and on and on. Pretty basic biography stuff.

Next you are going to want to take it to the next level. So you do some searching on some of the social media sites. NOTE: I am not going into Fanfic, “community” sites, or blogs. Those sites my friends are for you to decide.

Twitter. Now you may not have a twitter account so you are going to want to have a friend (MER) who is obsessed with twitter and who will spend a large portion of time ciphering through shizz for you. This usually comes packaged as a sweet little email or text. Then you are going to want to tweet them (obsession) or have your good friend tweet them. With a little bit of luck, good timing, and persistence they may tweet you back. Don’t be too aggressive or scary though. So maybe a softer version of yourself.

Facebook. Now FB sucks. Don’t get me wrong I am obsessed with FB and I use it all the time but most people you are obsessed with don’t use it. Sorry, it’s the truth. They may have a page that you can like but it’s basically run by your doppelganger in Minnesota. Ya dig.

Instagram. Now if your obsession is of the younger more hipster persuasion they are probably gonna have an instagram. Where they can tease you with all kinds of pictures of them doing fun things and eating things you will never eat and going to bed knowing you cannot steal any of their pictures cos instagram is a selfish bish like that. That being said remember there is always someone a little more cray than you and a little quicker who has probably set up a fan page. Not even close to as good but take what you can get stingy.

Tumblr. Hallulahyuefrigginelouaaaa. Tumbs is boss. I mean you can follow people, you can steal from tumblr. You can have your friend (MER) track down everything she can find and put it all together nicely for you. Every Gif you can dream of probably exists on there and if it doesn’t make it. Side Note: insert amazing theme song.

YouTube. I don’t really need to go into this one, kids. I mean…its YouTube. Any interview you ever wanted to see, any fan tribute you wanted to see, any anything, it’s there or YOU can make it there. Be a self starter.

There are a lot other sites you can check out but I think you get the jest. Finally, an extremely important tip is having a support system in place so you can eventually have human contact. I cannot stress this enough. When you come out of the rabbit hole like a bear after hibernation you are gonna want someone there.  Your friends and family may not understand your obsession but they can still support it. You may not understand why your friend keeps sending you Daryl Dixon photos at 3 am but you know text back a smiley face before your roll back over and go to bed. Why, because that is what friends do.

Amber xoxox





  1. One question. How do you know when you've, maybe, gone too far? What are some indicators that you should pull back a little? I have a friend....

  2. It's like porn. You know it when you know it